This past weekend had to be one of the highlights of the year as we had Dr. Andy Snider from the Master's Seminary come and speak on "Holy Affections" - Emotions to the Glory of God. It was one of the most challenging and interesting topics that I have heard for a retreat as he addressed emotions from the perspective of God's definition and expression as seen in Scripture.
The first message on humility as the soil in which the graces could grow was really so appropriate. Each succeeding message only solidified what we heard, that we need to express emotions in such a way that would reflect less of me and more of Jesus. To experience God's love, to understand anger in light of God's righteousness, and to experience a joy that looks toward eternity, all these thoughts and more were so practically addressed but with a deep biblical foundation.
What also was such a blessing was to see how so many of you really took to heart the opportunity to have fellowship, especially with new people. It was wonderful to see people sharing after the messages, enjoying the game room, passing out the snacks, and just making the most of every opportunity. It seemed like the weekend went by so quickly, but I was able to interact with a good number of people.
I hope that we all will take what we have learned and apply the lessons in ways that would reflect that the truth has taken root and that we would truly express our emotions in a way that is not so much about me but all about God.
Don't miss out next year on the all-church camp!
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Monday, November 05, 2007
Membership in the Local Church and Dating
An odd title for a message, but one that I have been thinking about quite a bit. The last time I did the DTR series, I talked about "Defining the relationship with church" and I introduced the importance of being in a healthy local church ministry where there would be strong leaders who could model godliness and provide a discipling dynamic reflecting Titus 2, where the older men and women would teach the younger men and women to grow in godly character and in their roles.
The sad fact is that because of the dearth of strong healthy local churches, there are many young men and women who are robbed of the opportunity to grow and learn. Many who are older think it is not worth their time to invest in the younger generation and it particularly shows in the lack of seriousness when it comes to how people view the children's and youth ministries. They are considered nothing more than glorified babysitting centers for many and the window of opportunity to lay a strong biblical foundation is too often lost.
What is sad to me that there are so many collegians who have not really seen what a healthy church can do. Many of their church experiences have simply discouraged them from even joining a church when they get to college and it is no surprise to see many go church-shopping for the first few years. But there is one thing they do seem to be quick at seeking - a dating relationship. But the lack of accountability and discipleship leads quickly to many problems and it is no surprise when I see many dating couples in college end up having a lot of troubles.
While I am not suggesting that becoming a member of a local church guarantees you a successful dating experience, it definitely can make a difference. When you have older men and women fulfilling their role to lead and disciple the younger men and women, you have an environment of accountability and care that provides the kind of place where young men and women can grow and be prepared to face all the realities of life by growing in godliness through the edification and fellowship that takes place within the church. To have elders who shepherd the flock by providing the nurturing of the Word of God in the lives of its members and to protect the flock by not only teaching doctrine but by pointing out both false teachers and the wolves who come to steal away people with the lies of this world - this is so vital if there is to be a healthy environment for people to not only grow but to develop relationships with one another in a God-honoring way.
I would challenge anyone to show me how being a member in a strong and healthy local church can be a detrimental thing for the dating scene. If anything, I believe it would provide the right kind of focus and context for dating couples to know that they are going to be cared for, prayed for, and held accountable by those who would share in the same common goal - the glory of God in all things.
For those of you who have experienced the benefits of being a member of a healthy local church ministry in your dating and/or marriage relationship, I would appreciate hearing some thoughts from you. Even if you are not dating or married, I would like to hear your thoughts on this topic. It would be interesting to see what you might think.
Thanks!!
The sad fact is that because of the dearth of strong healthy local churches, there are many young men and women who are robbed of the opportunity to grow and learn. Many who are older think it is not worth their time to invest in the younger generation and it particularly shows in the lack of seriousness when it comes to how people view the children's and youth ministries. They are considered nothing more than glorified babysitting centers for many and the window of opportunity to lay a strong biblical foundation is too often lost.
What is sad to me that there are so many collegians who have not really seen what a healthy church can do. Many of their church experiences have simply discouraged them from even joining a church when they get to college and it is no surprise to see many go church-shopping for the first few years. But there is one thing they do seem to be quick at seeking - a dating relationship. But the lack of accountability and discipleship leads quickly to many problems and it is no surprise when I see many dating couples in college end up having a lot of troubles.
While I am not suggesting that becoming a member of a local church guarantees you a successful dating experience, it definitely can make a difference. When you have older men and women fulfilling their role to lead and disciple the younger men and women, you have an environment of accountability and care that provides the kind of place where young men and women can grow and be prepared to face all the realities of life by growing in godliness through the edification and fellowship that takes place within the church. To have elders who shepherd the flock by providing the nurturing of the Word of God in the lives of its members and to protect the flock by not only teaching doctrine but by pointing out both false teachers and the wolves who come to steal away people with the lies of this world - this is so vital if there is to be a healthy environment for people to not only grow but to develop relationships with one another in a God-honoring way.
I would challenge anyone to show me how being a member in a strong and healthy local church can be a detrimental thing for the dating scene. If anything, I believe it would provide the right kind of focus and context for dating couples to know that they are going to be cared for, prayed for, and held accountable by those who would share in the same common goal - the glory of God in all things.
For those of you who have experienced the benefits of being a member of a healthy local church ministry in your dating and/or marriage relationship, I would appreciate hearing some thoughts from you. Even if you are not dating or married, I would like to hear your thoughts on this topic. It would be interesting to see what you might think.
Thanks!!
Friday, October 26, 2007
The Kindness of God Demonstrated
Christine and I just celebrated our second anniversary this past Monday up in Seattle. It was a really low key event. We just went out for dessert and coffee and spent a little time talking and evaluating our marriage. It was a great weekend because we were also with family and had a lot of time with Mom and Dad and my brother David.
During our conversation on Monday, one of the topics that came up was about all the experiences we had with the people we previously had liked romantically and/or had been rejected by. We had some good laughs talking about junior high and high school crushes and shared some amusing stories. It dawned on me, though, that I always talk about the sovereignty of God in directing us in our relationships, and surely we could see now how God had been orchestrating our lives through these different experiences. But really it is the kindness of God that keeps us from the ones who were never intended to be our "significant other." God was kind to not answer my prayers favorably all those years in elementary school, junior high, high school, and college. It is not to say that these girls were not good girls (some of them were and still are remarkable girls). It is that He knew what was best for me, that it would be better to save me for Christine. And it was His kindness demonstrated.
I think this mentality helps because it can sound cold to remind people that God is sovereign when they just get rejected by someone else in the pursuit of a relationship. (Certainly the sovereignty of God should be a comforting and wonderful doctrine, but it can be received wrongly.) What a great reminder that His sovereignty works together with His kindness for our good and His glory. So, Christine and I toasted our coffees on Monday night to the kindness of God in not granting us what we had prayed for in the past and causing us to wait until we had met each other.
Happy 2nd anniversary, Christine! I praise God for His kindness to me.
During our conversation on Monday, one of the topics that came up was about all the experiences we had with the people we previously had liked romantically and/or had been rejected by. We had some good laughs talking about junior high and high school crushes and shared some amusing stories. It dawned on me, though, that I always talk about the sovereignty of God in directing us in our relationships, and surely we could see now how God had been orchestrating our lives through these different experiences. But really it is the kindness of God that keeps us from the ones who were never intended to be our "significant other." God was kind to not answer my prayers favorably all those years in elementary school, junior high, high school, and college. It is not to say that these girls were not good girls (some of them were and still are remarkable girls). It is that He knew what was best for me, that it would be better to save me for Christine. And it was His kindness demonstrated.
I think this mentality helps because it can sound cold to remind people that God is sovereign when they just get rejected by someone else in the pursuit of a relationship. (Certainly the sovereignty of God should be a comforting and wonderful doctrine, but it can be received wrongly.) What a great reminder that His sovereignty works together with His kindness for our good and His glory. So, Christine and I toasted our coffees on Monday night to the kindness of God in not granting us what we had prayed for in the past and causing us to wait until we had met each other.
Happy 2nd anniversary, Christine! I praise God for His kindness to me.
Monday, October 22, 2007
In the Line of Fire
It was four years ago almost to the week that we faced the fires that hit San Diego pretty hard. I remember driving through the 15 freeway heading south to the church office (off of Convoy at the time) on my way to teach a baptism class when I drove right through a firewall, which had to be one of the more scary moments of my life as everything turned pitch black and the heat was pretty intense. After what seemed like forever, I saw daylight and drove through and it was an eerie feeling. We had to move our church service that day to someone's home and looking off into the distance, it was pretty strange to think that fires could do so much to change the course of how we look at life.
This morning I was awakened to find that we had to evacuate our home and after packing some things, we moved over to Scripps Ranch, only to find that we had to evacuate from there as well. Moving to the coast in La Jolla, the day has been pretty much filled with trying to coordinate the church members in finding homes for all the people who have had to evacuate.
Though it is pretty hectic considering all that is going on, I can't help but thank God for His grace and goodness in how the church family is responding with every effort being made to help provide shelter and care for one another. It really is great, even those who are new to the church are jumping in and offering their homes.
Dropping by the church, I couldn't help but look at all my books and realize that they would go up pretty fast in a fire. I took a few to prepare for the next coming weeks so that I would at least have a few resources but it was a bit sad looking at everything, realizing that a lifetime of collecting books could go away in a moment. But having studied Ecclesiastes these past few months, it has been sobering to understand that everything in this life is really passing in nature and without God, there would be no point to it. A life filled with plenty would be an empty life without God but a life filled with God though with little would make me a pretty rich man. These are thoughts that are not so easy to consider when one realizes that there is a very good chance you could lose your home and all your possessions, but when you realize that you're going to leave it all behind one day anyway, it doesn't seem so important after all.
What is all the more important is seeing that the love of God moves us to care for one another in time of need and I really am so thankful to have a church family that will stand in the line of fire (literally) and apply the kind of family love that we have talked about in Romans 12:10 and has been generous and hospitable and considerate in considering the needs of others.
Who knows what the next few days will bring but one thing for sure, I know that they will bring the grace of God through the love and care of our church family.
This morning I was awakened to find that we had to evacuate our home and after packing some things, we moved over to Scripps Ranch, only to find that we had to evacuate from there as well. Moving to the coast in La Jolla, the day has been pretty much filled with trying to coordinate the church members in finding homes for all the people who have had to evacuate.
Though it is pretty hectic considering all that is going on, I can't help but thank God for His grace and goodness in how the church family is responding with every effort being made to help provide shelter and care for one another. It really is great, even those who are new to the church are jumping in and offering their homes.
Dropping by the church, I couldn't help but look at all my books and realize that they would go up pretty fast in a fire. I took a few to prepare for the next coming weeks so that I would at least have a few resources but it was a bit sad looking at everything, realizing that a lifetime of collecting books could go away in a moment. But having studied Ecclesiastes these past few months, it has been sobering to understand that everything in this life is really passing in nature and without God, there would be no point to it. A life filled with plenty would be an empty life without God but a life filled with God though with little would make me a pretty rich man. These are thoughts that are not so easy to consider when one realizes that there is a very good chance you could lose your home and all your possessions, but when you realize that you're going to leave it all behind one day anyway, it doesn't seem so important after all.
What is all the more important is seeing that the love of God moves us to care for one another in time of need and I really am so thankful to have a church family that will stand in the line of fire (literally) and apply the kind of family love that we have talked about in Romans 12:10 and has been generous and hospitable and considerate in considering the needs of others.
Who knows what the next few days will bring but one thing for sure, I know that they will bring the grace of God through the love and care of our church family.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
DTR2: Waiting for Magic?
Marriage is a scary proposition for many to consider. But what is amazing to me is how many Christians do not really seek God's truth regarding marriage but look to their own feelings and emotions to guide them in making decisions. Many will place intuition and things like compatibility and personality issues as the primary factors in making a decision and wait for lightning to strike. This is the so-called "magic" that people look for and while I will not deny that there is some element of subjectivity, it seems a bit odd that many will dismiss seeking God's Word for guidance regarding marriage and instead look for the "magic."
This is seen in the whole world of dating where both men and women use worldly wisdom, if you could even call it wisdom, to make their decisions on what makes for a good partner. There are those who would entertain having a dating relationship with a non-believer. Scripture is clear on this point and while I sort of addressed it in passing, I realized that for some, they might have though it was just my opinion. It is not.
2 Corinthians 6:14-15
Do not be bound with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer with an unbeliever?
If you are thinking of entering into a relationship with an unbeliever just because you feel there is some "magic", you are truly deceived by the illusion that there could be a genuine and intimate love relationship that would be to the glory of God. How could you engage in a relationship with thoughts of marriage when marriage is to reflect the relationship between Christ and His bride, the church? If you do not agree on the most important issue of your standing with God, how will you have anything else in common that is of significance? You might enjoy the same music, have the same hobbies, and feel like you "click" but if the foundations are not built on the same Rock, I don't care how compatible you feel, e-harmony tests notwithstanding.
For the Christian man or woman who is seriously contemplating a dating relationship, you cannot consider it without seeing it as a trajectory toward marriage. That's why you can't afford on some subjective "magic" to be your primary guide. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and DO NOT LEAN ON YOUR OWN UNDERSTANDING!! (Proverbs 3:5). In ALL YOUR WAYS acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths (Proverbs 3:5). I would take it that God intended this to be true even to this day and that it would include all things, including dating.
I find it a bit strange that those who would say they are Christians are less inclined to trust God and more inclined to trust human wisdom, when there has been more than enough evidence as to its failures. Just go to your local bookstore and check out the section on relationships and it is chock full of nonsense.
This is not to say that Christians automatically have everything work out perfectly, even though they might try their best to follow the right path. We live in a sinful world and even the most sincere Christians are not able to see everthing clearly. Yet we find hope in the sovereignty of God that He causes all things to work together for good. This is not an excuse to justify willful disobedience to God's Word - that is simply unacceptable. You should never presume on the grace of God to get away with sin. But it is to say that as you do trust in the Lord with all your heart, He will never give you something that you can't handle (1 Cor. 10:13) and He will provide all you need to make it through.
So instead of looking to illusions and deceptions, look to the God of truth who not only created the institution of marriage, but has the means by which to get there in a way that is consistent with His will.
This is seen in the whole world of dating where both men and women use worldly wisdom, if you could even call it wisdom, to make their decisions on what makes for a good partner. There are those who would entertain having a dating relationship with a non-believer. Scripture is clear on this point and while I sort of addressed it in passing, I realized that for some, they might have though it was just my opinion. It is not.
2 Corinthians 6:14-15
Do not be bound with unbelievers; for what partnership have righteousness and lawlessness, or what fellowship has light with darkness? Or what harmony has Christ with Belial, or what has a believer with an unbeliever?
If you are thinking of entering into a relationship with an unbeliever just because you feel there is some "magic", you are truly deceived by the illusion that there could be a genuine and intimate love relationship that would be to the glory of God. How could you engage in a relationship with thoughts of marriage when marriage is to reflect the relationship between Christ and His bride, the church? If you do not agree on the most important issue of your standing with God, how will you have anything else in common that is of significance? You might enjoy the same music, have the same hobbies, and feel like you "click" but if the foundations are not built on the same Rock, I don't care how compatible you feel, e-harmony tests notwithstanding.
For the Christian man or woman who is seriously contemplating a dating relationship, you cannot consider it without seeing it as a trajectory toward marriage. That's why you can't afford on some subjective "magic" to be your primary guide. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and DO NOT LEAN ON YOUR OWN UNDERSTANDING!! (Proverbs 3:5). In ALL YOUR WAYS acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths (Proverbs 3:5). I would take it that God intended this to be true even to this day and that it would include all things, including dating.
I find it a bit strange that those who would say they are Christians are less inclined to trust God and more inclined to trust human wisdom, when there has been more than enough evidence as to its failures. Just go to your local bookstore and check out the section on relationships and it is chock full of nonsense.
This is not to say that Christians automatically have everything work out perfectly, even though they might try their best to follow the right path. We live in a sinful world and even the most sincere Christians are not able to see everthing clearly. Yet we find hope in the sovereignty of God that He causes all things to work together for good. This is not an excuse to justify willful disobedience to God's Word - that is simply unacceptable. You should never presume on the grace of God to get away with sin. But it is to say that as you do trust in the Lord with all your heart, He will never give you something that you can't handle (1 Cor. 10:13) and He will provide all you need to make it through.
So instead of looking to illusions and deceptions, look to the God of truth who not only created the institution of marriage, but has the means by which to get there in a way that is consistent with His will.
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