Flexing Some Muscle

It's been three weeks since the pastoral staff has been working out together on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. Honestly, I didn't think I would ever get to a point where I would actually enjoy that time, but strangely, I now look forward to it. It has been easier getting myself ready and out the door. The one part of it that I particularly dreaded was the treadmill. (I can't express how much I abhor running.) But honestly, that part of it really isn't that bad anymore either. It's not that it's easier. I still have a looong way to go before I get anywhere near being healthy. =) It's just that I've gotten used to it and the workout wouldn't be the same without it.

At first, working out in the mornings would drain me physically for the rest of the day. My body would be sore and achy all week. Now, I think my body has grown accustomed to it, and I actually feel like I have more strength and energy each day. It's amazing how a little bit of discipline can go a long way.

One other interesting observation is that it seems when I am doing well physically, my spiritual life comes on board and improves as well. I know bodily discipline is of little profitable and that I should discipline myself for the purpose of godliness, but being disciplined in general affects my life as a whole. I eat better, I sleep better, and I spend better time with the Lord. Perhaps it is because my mindset is to be disciplined. When I don't have this discipline in my life, my spiritual walk tends to be more sporadic and inconsistent.

I'm so thankful for the accountability that John and J.R. bring each week. I'm sure it's not always going to be easy for us to keep this going, but knowing that I'm the one with the key to the gym gets me up. If I'm late, I affect everyone. =)

Please pray for the pastoral staff in this regard. We understand the importance of exercising regularly because we need the energy that comes with it. We don't want to be a bunch of sluggish sacks of fat. I heard once that Eric Alexander characterized American preachers that way. He said that he could always tell who was a lazy pastor because they were fat. Pastoral ministry is difficult enough without our bodies slowing us down unnecessarily. Please pray for this discipline that we might be more effective for God's kingdom as a result. And maybe, just maybe, one day J.R. won't make me and John look so bad!

October Update

Greetings to the few, the faithful, the ones who read this blog =)

It's nice to know that there are some people praying so I will give an update as to how things have been going. I'll probably only do this a few times while I am officially on leave.

Healthwise, I am currently wearing an appliance in my mouth 24 hours a day to help correct my jaw alignment. I am taking two different kinds of medication for my blood pressure. I have to wait for a month before I go for the followup with the cardiologist. I have been checked for glaucoma and it looks like I'm in the clear for now (thanks Dr. Jeff Lee!) but he mentioned that my left optic nerve is bent. My skin condition has cleared up for now after getting steroids (thanks the other Dr. Lee!) - don't worry, my muscles aren't bulking up. My gastro-enterologist visit will take about a month to setup so it won't be until November. I still have to start physical therapy for my assorted neck and back and jaw ailments. So pretty much that's it for now.

I am getting a little more sleep and rest. It's strange trying to avoid thinking about church. I realize that I have been constantly thinking about church and it is difficult to keep it out of my mind. Trying to visit other churches has also been challenging as I realize it is not easy finding a church that where I would be in alignment with doctrine and ministry philosophy. But it has been interesting observing how other churches do things. I hope to visit other churches in the San Diego area and get to know more of the pastors.

I will be visiting Austin, Texas for a couple of weeks to visit my brother-in-law as well as to have some peace and quiet away from eveything. I hope to really get some good quiet time to rest as well as have my body and spirit renewed. So please pray that it would be a profitable time.

Thank you for those who pray. I truly appreciate it. There are some who tell me they pray and I'm sure there are others who do pray that I am not aware of - your prayers are precious and without them I would definitely be at a loss. Please continue.

I hope to return at the beginning of the year in January so please pray that these next few months will be a beneficial time of recovery.

Pastor John

Taking My Leave of Absence

To the LBC family,

I know that many of you maybe were not at church this past Sunday to hear me share but I am going to explain what I will be doing with my requested leave of absence. These past two years have been incredibly difficult with various issues that we have had to address here at the church. In the summer of 2006, I took what was supposed to be a two month sabbatical and apart from about a couple of weeks and Sundays, I was still immersed in my work as there were some significant challenges that we were dealing with at the time so I really did not get a chance to utilize that time in the way I had hoped. Since then, things have steadily become more challenging and with the trauma of what took place at the end of last year, my physical condition started to deteriorate. This year proved to have no letdown in the stresses that we have been facing within the leadership and it all finally came to an apex a couple of weekends ago when I realized that I could not sustain my responsibilities with my physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual state being broken down as much as it was. So it was with great difficulty that I have had to come to the conclusion that as much as I love the church, I am not indispensible and that I have to trust God with the people of the church whom I love deeply. It is with much reluctance that I step back because I truly love ministering to people and at least for those who really know me, they know that I really care for people. I have been accused of caring too much - I really don't know how one can care too much. I believe people care too little because they are so preoccupied with themselves that they only care about how they are cared for and not so much how they should care for others. That's why it is no surprise to me that we have as many relational conflicts as we do in the church. The selfishness and self-centeredness that grips so many people truly reflects a "life is all about me" kind of attitude and the stranglehold it has is very difficult to break. But as we have shared so many times at Lighthouse, "life is not about you" and we need to really carry that out.

So what will I be doing during my leave? I'm not sure yet how long it will be but there are several things that I must do:

1. Address my various health problems. To make a short list, I have to followup with the defective heart valve and find out what is causing my chest pains. I will be visiting a cardiologist to see how things go with that. I have to visit a gastro-enterologist to see what is causing the spasms in my esophagus and stomach. I have to visit an ophthomologist for possible glaucoma as my eyesight continues to worsen. I have to visit a dermatologist to address various skin issues that have been causing me much discomfort over the past year. I also have to go through some physical therapy and/or chiropractics to address all the aches and pains I have all over my body. My blood pressure has been consistently very high over the past year so I will have to start taking medications and monitor the response. I will also have probably do a sleep study to see why I am unable to sleep well. I will also have to address some problems with my jaw as I will be wearing some devices 24 hours a day so as to confront some muscular problems that have been causing me constant pain. It will prohibit me from speaking much so I will not be able to do a whole lot in terms of preaching or teaching.
Hopefully that's all, at least what I can remember.

2. Let go of all ministry responsibilities. This will probable be the most difficult thing to do but I will be relinquishing all pastoral responsibilities during my leave. That means I will not preach, lead, plan, counsel, disciple, or in any other formal way carry out my pastoral role at Lighthouse. I will have to entrust the elders and pastoral staff to shoulder the load and do their best to carry on what needs to happen at the church. You will need to pray for the pastoral staff and elders extra diligently so that they might have strength and wisdom to carry the extra load.

3. Get rest. I hope to get physical, mental, and spiritual rest by spending extended time in getting sleep, exercise, and personal times in God's Word and prayer without the pressure of pastoral responsibilities weighing on my shoulders. I also hope to take some time to attend a couple of conferences for my own personal edification.

4. Spend time with my wife and children. While I do my best to care for my family, it is obvious that they have to share me with the church family in many ways that are at a sacrifice to them. So I hope to be an encouragement to my wife in being a husband who loves her and to my children in helping raise them in God's ways. They are all growing way too fast and I need to take time to just share in the regular daily things of life and create memories that they will hopefully cherish.

So I would appreciate your prayers. I do not know what the future holds but I do hope to return soon and hopefully re-energized and strengthened to go for another 20 years.

In His grace,
Pastor John

Meditations from 1 Thessalonians 2:7

I have had a lot of time to think about ministry this past week especially as I have been walking through 1 Thessalonians in my daily devotions. If there is any principle I am confident we must master, it is to do all things in love for God and for one another. This is so evident in the life and ministry of Paul, and it needs to be evident in us as well.

With the growth of the church body, it can become very easy to reduce ministry to programs. With this mentality, you just treat people as if they are problems that need to be solved. We forget that they are people with hearts that are oftentimes broken and in need of mending. We analyze a person’s situation and treat ministry as if it is simply taking a round biblical principle and plugging it into their round problem hole. I wish ministry was that simple, but unfortunately it isn’t. People are more complicated than that. Problems are more complicated than that. Oftentimes you unravel one problem to realize there are thirty more underneath it.

On top of that, a person isn’t just a problem that needs a solution. People feel. They hurt. They can be broken. Paul’s attitude towards the church was to treat them with gentleness as a nursing mother tenderly cares for her children (1 Thess. 2:7). The idea of gentleness literally means to be "mild, warm or kind." It is the exact opposite of using “tough love” or treating people coldly as if they are projects that need to be worked on. Paul’s example of love for the church is something I know I need to learn. There is so much to ministry I do not yet know and am still in the process of learning.

Pastoral Prayer Request

To my dear Lighthouse family,

It was good to be with you this Sunday after having been gone for two weekends. It was especially sweet to be together for our time of corporate worship and fellowship, to celebrate communion, to introduce our missions teams, and to welcome the Faith Bible Church team from Canton, Ohio who visited us again on their way to Mexico. Sundays are always wonderful reminders of the grace of God as we celebrate the community that we share in Christ.

I realized that I was not very specific in sharing how my health conditions were so to make it clear, I will share it here. I know that I have often told others to share of their prayer needs and to not withhold it and I realize I have done what I have told others not to do, and that is to not allow people to share in their opportunity to pray.

I have been suffering chest pains for about a month and while I have had some chest pains before, they usually went away. But this time they did not and in fact would seem worse typically in the evenings where I would have shortness of breath, light-headedness, and a lot of pressure. So I finally went to the emergency room about a week ago where they ran a battery of tests and confirmed that I had a problem with my mitral valve with moderate leakage. So they referred me to a cardiologist which I went to a few days later. There they took another sonogram to confirm the condition of the valve and since they had no recorded history of my problem, they have decided to monitor my condition over the next few months to see what kind of rate there is in the deterioration of the valve. So we shall see how things go and hopefully when I get back from the Czech Republic, I'll be able to follow up and get a further update. My blood pressure has also been considerably high, particularly in the past year and much of it has been in conjunction with the challenges that we have had at church that have brought much stress and difficulty. So with all being said and done, I need to do a lot better job being prayerful and laying my burdens before God and to not be anxious in light of circumstances. Admittedly, I struggle greatly when there is relational turmoil and this past year has been by far the most difficult. My heart is both figuratively and literally broken over the events that have taken place as there has been no greater sorrow than to have broken fellowship with those that have been dear to me. The impact has spread far across our extended family and has affected the perception that friends and even members within Lighthouse have of both myself and the elders. But God has also been gracious in bringing encouragement and joy through how He is working in the lives of our leaders as well as other members of our church. So there is much to be thankful for despite the circumstances. There can be joy when we encounter various trials because it truly does bring about endurance that has its perfecting work in bringing about holiness and sanctification in our lives.

Thank you for your prayers. They are indeed most precious to me and I value nothing more than your supplication on my behalf. God is indeed good to provide such a wonderful church family that seeks to love and edify one another.

Summer Camp with the Youth

This past weekend our youth ministry, consisting of our incredible youth pastor JR Cuevas along with the equally incredible staff, joined Faith Bible Church of Murrietta for a 6 day, 5 night summer retreat at Lake San Antonio, just above San Luis Obisbo. Our family, including the little ones, took part in a very new experience for them - tent camping in 110 degree heat! It was dirty (literally) and with lots of bugs and oppressive heat but nonetheless it was a fun time as our youth were exposed to the "large youth group" dynamic, which was very similar to my Grace Church experience in junior high and high school. There were about 160 kids in addition to a whole lot of staff and parents from FBC who took care of all the cooking and prep to run the camp. It was quite an incredible scene to watch dads who took time off to cook on an outdoor grill in 110 degree heat with the grill topping off at around 600 degrees (some of them literally got burnt as they cooked!). The kids got to enjoy going to the lake several days to try wakeboarding and getting dragged around on an innertube by speedboats.

But the highlight for me was the opportunity to team up with Chris Mueller to preach to the youth. We taught through the book of Jonah and it was a surreal experience to sit in the audience with the youth as Chris spoke. It brought back memories of 30 years ago when I first sat under his teaching. But then to go up and have him in the audience was quite weird. But then I quickly remembered that I wasn't preaching for his approval but for God's approval. It was a memorable time for me and I was so encouraged by Chris as he shared with me his thoughts on my preaching. This was the first time he heard me preach in person.

I can't help but truly thank God that He has provided me with a pastoral mentor like Chris. His gentle yet firm admonishments as well as his constant encouragement have been so timely in the past year and a half as the past year and a half have been truly difficult in dealing with leadership issues, especially at a relational level. To be heartbroken and devastated by those that work with you is something that most people will never understand from a pastor's point of view, but Chris, having gone through it in a most devastating way by the person who had been closest to him for many years, has been able to provide the kind of perspective that only someone who actually went through these kinds of trials could understand. I can't help but think if God didn't send him to Temecula at the time that He did, the past year and a half could have turned out very different for me, and definitely not for the better. But God in His grace saw fit to meet my weakness and provide someone who has been truly like a Paul to me.

To have Chris and his wife Jean minister to our family, even to our kids, has been a special encouragement as well. Jean has ministered to Angela in ways that only a pastor's wife could and she has a special gift to touch little ones lives. Olivia just loved being with her and again I just couldn't help but thank God for His gracious gifts to our family through Chris and Jean.

This has been particularly a challenging time as the recent events have taken a pretty strong toll on my health, I would ask for your prayers as I have to get checked for some possible health issues. But regardless of the prognosis, I am thankful that God has been so gracious to me.

Please pray for our youth ministry as well, for JR and the staff as they invest in the lives of our youth. They have been doing a terrific job and their willingness to invest time in this retreat was just another example of their devotion to our youth.

God Is the Gospel, by John Piper

This is one of those books that is quickly becoming a "classic." As defined by Rick Holland, a classic is a book that everyone has on their shelf and no one has read! In my personal reading, I have been trying to pick up many of these classics and start reading through them. Fortunately for me, this wonderful book by John Piper is one of the first ones I picked up. If you have not read this book, I highly recommend it.

God Is the Gospel provides a good and helpful walk through the gospel message in a way that many Christians might not understand. In a church that is saturated with man-centered theology and ministry, Piper redirects our thoughts to God and reminds us that the gospel is primarily about God and His glory. Drawing from truths read in John Owen and (of course!) Jonathan Edwards, Piper walks through all the blessings of the gospel, including justification, sanctification, and glorification, and shows how these gifts of the gospel were meant to ultimately provide us with the opportunity to see and savor God. The gospel is not as much about making much of us as it is about making much of Christ.

Thus, Piper asks a significant and poignant question: If you could go to heaven after you die and experience all its wonderful blessings -- the absence of pain, the perfect fellowship of the saints, streets of gold -- except that God was not there, would you be content to remain there? Sadly for most Christians, this would be acceptible because they do not treasure God in their lives as much as they treasure the blessings and gifts God provides. Salvation from sin is an amazing gift, but it was not given as an end to itself. It was given as a means to enjoy God forever. This is what the Apostle John meant when he wrote, "And we know that the Son of God has come, and has given us understanding so that we may know Him who is true; and we are in Him who is true, in His Son Jesus Christ. This is the true God and eternal life" (1 John 5:20). Christ came and gave us understanding so that we may know Him who is true. The purpose was to know God, not just His salvation blessings.

I encourage all to pick up and read this book. Read it along with John Owen's amazing book The Glory of Christ and fill your minds with meditations of Christ. It is in the face of Christ that we are to see God's glory. This is why Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 4:6, "For God, who said, 'Light shall shine out of darkness,' is the One who has shone in our hearts to give the Light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ." God Is the Gospel serves as a wonderful commentary of this foundational verse.

Practicing in Dating What You Know to Be True

A few weeks ago I had a chance to speak during the DTR series about “Breaking Up to the Glory of God.” In the introduction to that message I made some comments about the importance of developing a solid theology of dating and I wanted to elaborate on those thoughts. The basic idea is that even Christians with a good understanding of theology oftentimes do not put their beliefs into practice when it comes to dating. Although they might profess to believe in particular aspects of biblical theology, they live as though they don’t. James exhorts believers not to be mere hearers of the Word, but doers also (James 1:22). In particular, it isn’t enough to have a correct understanding of God and His Word if you are not willing to allow your beliefs to affect your thinking.

Here are some examples of how I have witnessed people doing this (and how I have done this as well!)…

The Glory of God. When it comes to the glory of God, every good Christian knows what Paul teaches in 1 Corinthians 10:31. Everything you do, regardless of how mundane, is supposed to be for the glory of God. The glory of God is really supposed to be the ultimate motivation behind everything a person does because God is worthy of all glory and honor and praise. When you seek to enter into a dating relationship, it becomes tempting to have personal desires take precedence over God’s will. You may seek to live for personal satisfaction rather than the glory of God, and that which should take ultimate priority takes a back seat. When you do not get what you want, you have sinful attitudes of doubting and complaining. This manifests that you do not seek God's glory as much as you ought.

The Sovereignty of God. Psalm 103:19 states, “The LORD has established His throne in the heavens, and His sovereignty rules over all.” You may have come to the conviction that God is sovereign over all things. The Bible even teaches that God is sovereign over a person’s salvation (Eph. 1:5), and many Christians are happy to accept this because they know that they would never have sought after God if He had not have first chosen them. When it comes to dating, though, practically you may exhibit a lack of trust in the sovereignty of God. Questions may flood into your mind like, “What if I don’t act soon enough?” or “What if he/she starts dating someone else?” All of a sudden, because you are gripped with getting what you want, you abandon your belief in the sovereignty of God and try to manipulate and control circumstances on your own. You must act because you doubt that the Lord will act on your behalf. You doubt that God is in control and so you take matters into your own hands.

The Goodness of God. James tells us that every good thing and every perfect gift is from our heavenly Father (James 1:17). Why is it that in the context of dating you tend to question God’s goodness so much? When things don’t go your way, you question whether God is good. “Why would God give me such longings only to not let me have what I want?” Ultimately, this is the wrong question to ask. The correct question is, “Why aren’t my desires in line with God’s desires for my life?” God is a good God, but somehow you may be tempted to doubt this if you do not end up with the person you had hoped for.

The Wisdom of God. Perhaps you are sure that a certain guy or gal is the one for you. When that person does not feel the same way as you, do you question whether God knows what He is doing? Perhaps you need to meditate on Romans 11:33-36 and the awesome wisdom of God. You ought not to act as though God is mistaken. He is infinitely wise and knows how to govern your life in the best way.

The Omniscience and Omnipresence of God. If you find yourself in the context of dating, and you have a clear understanding that God is always there and always watching, you would be less susceptible to sexual sin. Solomon says to his son in the context of warning him against sexual sin, “For the ways of a man are before the eyes of the LORD, And He watches all his paths” (Prov. 5:21). Do you live as though God is always there and that He is always watching? Psalm 139:1-12 speaks about God’s amazing omnipresence and omniscience, but in a dating context you may live as though you think God is blind or absent.

The Sufficiency of Scripture. When it comes to the theology of the Bible, many would argue that the Bible doesn’t say anything about dating. I know what these people mean, that one will not find the idea of dating in any Bible concordance and that there is no chapter and verse on dating in particular. My greatest question in response, though, is if the Bible gives no wisdom about dating, where do you turn for that wisdom? 2 Timothy 3:16-17 and Psalm 19:7-11 speak of the sufficiency of the Word of God. In it we find the instructions for life and God’s requirements of us. It is the standard of truth that all other worldly wisdom must answer to. If the Bible says nothing about dating, giving no principles to help those in a dating context, then how can a person know how he or she is supposed to date? Would you rather turn to Oprah, movies, or your friends? Where are you going to get the guidance that is necessary to pursue a dating relationship that honors God if not from the Bible?

The Authority of Scripture. Even after a person seeks the Scriptures for principles that are applicable in a dating context, they do not always abide by them. When you act against clear principles from God’s Word, you manifest a distrust in the authority of Scripture. You would rather turn to another authority and reason for yourself what is right or wrong. The nation of Israel was guilty of this and fell into moral ruin. God says the reason why they did this was because, “In those days there was no king in Israel; everyone did what was right in his own eyes” (Judges 21:25). So often we think it is wise to act on what our hearts tell us. We think God is giving us peace about our decisions because we feel good about them. But the Bible says that our hearts are deceitful and sick (Jer. 17:9). Because of our sinfulness, our minds have been tainted by sin (cf. Gen. 6:5; Rom. 1:21-22). It is because of sin’s impact on the mind that our hearts are not the best determiner of what is sound. We need to seek the authority of God’s Word because without it we are like people in the dark with no light to lead us (Ps. 119:105).

These are just a few examples of how we demonstrate the weakness of our theology in the context of dating and relationships. We would be wise to be more consistent. It is not enough to have a load of head knowledge about God and His Word if you are not willing to live as though you believe it. God is not out to kill your fun. He desires the best for you. When you trust in His character, even when things do not go your way, you can hope that He has a better plan in store for you. Practicing good theology is vital to surviving the "dating game"! I cannot imagine how I would have survived all the anxiety, rejection, and loneliness if I did not have the sound principles and teaching from God's Word. It is not that I practiced everything perfectly either. As one of my seminary professors said, "Dating is a cruel, hard game... but we must all play that game." What better way to tackle one of the most significant decisions in your life than to seek God's Word for wisdom and guidance?

Membership Interviews

John and I are in the middle of conducting membership interviews for the church and so far it has been a tremendous encouragement and joy. It is always a blessing to hear of how God has brought people out of their sinful way of living and placed them in Christ. The testimonies of those coming out for membership have been incredible and we praise God for His work in their lives. Every time a person is convinced of the truth of the gospel and repents of their sin, it magnifies the grace of God and His glory.

It is also encouraging to hear what people are drawn to when they come to Lighthouse. Of course, people want to grow in the teaching of God's Word so that they can be equipped to live their lives the best they can for God's glory. But it is great to hear how people are drawn by the love of the members here for one another. So often in churches that emphasize truth, there is a lack of an emphasis on love. People have this idea that truth is a bunch of cold-hearted facts that must be communicated in a harsh, condescending way. So far as we can see, the members at Lighthouse really have learned to stand for the truth in a loving and gracious way.

I just wanted to encourage the church that people take notice of your love for God and one another. They are drawn to the church because of it.

"9 Now as to the love of the brethren, you have no need for anyone to write to you, for you yourselves are taught by God to love one another; 10 for indeed you do practice it toward all the brethren who are in all Macedonia. But we urge you, brethren, to excel still more." 1 Thessalonians 4:9-10.

Pursuing a Gentle and Quiet Spirit

DTR2 Q&A

Question: How does one pursue developing a gentle and quiet spirit as found in 1 Peter 3:4?

Answer:

As discussed this past Sunday at the DTR2 session, I shared about various qualities one should look for in a God-honoring relationship. For the ladies, one of the first qualities that was brought up was that of a gentle and quiet spirit. What does it mean to have a gentle and quiet spirit and how does one pursue nurturing such a quality?

The word "gentle" refers to the character quality that is most marked by a humble and kind spirit that provides the basis for submission, which is the primary quality being addressed in 1 Peter 3:1, "In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husband." Now someone might get distracted at this point and say, "I'm not a wife yet!", but that would be to rush too quickly to judgment.

The quality of gentleness is one that stems from being filled with the Holy Spirit. In Galatians 5:22-23, the fruit of the Spirit is characterized in a nine-fold display of one who is walking in the Spirit (Gal. 5:16). So gentleness is not simply reserved for wives alone but is to be characteristic of every Christian, men included.

For those that might minimize the importance of gentleness, it was displayed in none other than our Lord Jesus Christ Himself as the Scriptures express the following:

Matthew 11:29
Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

Matthew 21:5
Say to the daughter of Zion, "Behold your King is coming to you, gentle, mounted on a donkey, even on a colt, the foal of beast of burden."

2 Corinthians 10:1
Now I, Paul myself urge you by the meekness and gentleness of Christ - I who am meek when face to face with you, but bold toward you when absent!

Our Lord displayed this trait of gentleness, which no doubt would lead us to consider how we might imitate Him. Consider He who is King of kings and He is exalted in being proclaimed "gentle" and even when the apostle Paul is exhorting the believers in Corinth, he appeals to them with the gentleness of Christ. It is an observation this is truly noteworthy for it uplifts this character trait from the stereotypical view of those being gentle equates to those who are weak.

Ladies, to display gentleness in your heart and spirit is not a sign of weakness or a lowering of value as the world might portray it. It is to follow in the very footsteps of Christ and it would be no small thing to display this trait, even in a dating relationship because first and foremost, you should be cultivating this quality simply because you are a Christian. But there is a special relevance as it relates to the role that you are to prepare for and that is to be a submissive wife.

Carefully consider the exhortations relating to gentleness in Scripture:

Matthew 5:5
Blessed are the gentle, for they shall inherit the earth.

Philippians 4:5
Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near.

Titus 3:1-2
Remind them to be subject to rulers, to authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good deed, to malign no one, to be peaceable, gentle, showing every consideration for all men.

Ephesians 4:1-2
Therefore I, the prisoner of the Lord, implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

Note how these passages are all relational in nature and it is not a sign of weakness but actually that of power. The gentle will inherit the earth!

I remember when growing up my mom gave me a devotion that she had heard from somewhere that gentleness was "power under control." This is very true. It is not a sign of weakness but it actually is a sign of strength. There is nothing more difficult than to show gentleness when confronted with conflict and when someone might be making life very difficult for you and you feel justified in getting angry and upset and letting your emotions out. That is why it is impossible to be truly gentle apart from the power of the Holy Spirit in those situations.

Gentleness is also the key to all relationships, even in relation to being submissive to the governing authorities. It is also key in how we display our high calling in Christ and it is what contributes to true unity in the church.

How true then would it be for any kind of relationship to grow and flourish? Ladies, your contribution to a God-honoring relationship for the long-term will depend on your commitment to growing a gentle spirit. So how is it possible?

This is where the next word "quiet" comes in to play. The idea of being quiet is just that, to be quiet. There is an appropriate time speak and to voice your opinions but there is also a time, maybe even more so to be quiet in your demeanor and disposition. The idea of "quiet" also belies a stillness or tranquility of spirit, one that is unaffected by the emotional turmoil that often causes many to end up being obnoxious and nasty, especially in their words and attitudes toward others. The idea of a gentle heart really is found and evidenced when someone is able to show self-control and show that the peace of God reigns in their hearts.

Philippians 4:6-7
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Note that these two verses follow verse 5, which mentions the idea of gentleness. When there are times of anxiety, which no doubt comes up quite often in the whole issue of dating relationships, whether you are in one or not, the key here is to have a spirit that is characterized by being at peace. A quiet spirit is one that truly experiences the peace of God and it will then coincide with the display of gentleness, regardless of the circumstances but especially in light of difficult circumstances. Too many ladies are quick to discard gentleness to the wind when confronted with various situations and while it might be understandable from the world's perspective to get upset and angry and to really run roughshod over a person, it is a far cry from one who is called to be living sacrifice before God. This is where we cannot afford to be conformed to the world but instead be transformed by the renewing of our minds with wisdom from above, which incidentally includes gentleness as being characteristic of heavenly wisdom (Jam. 3:17).

One last thing to note going back to 1 Peter 3:4. When women are challenged to exhibit a gentle and quiet spirit, you must consider that there are two significant things about it that make it important. First, it is an imperishable quality, that is, it is incorruptible and has an eternal quality about it. It is not subject to cultural revision or a changing of the times. It is a quality that when displayed in a God-honoring way is timeless. Second, it is a quality that is precious in the sight of God. It is the inner beauty of the heart that God sees as most valuable. Just as when Samuel was looking for a king out of the sons of Jesse, God admonished his short-sightedness when he thought the first-born was going to be chosen. "God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart" (1 Sam. 16:7).

Ladies, if you desire to see the glory of God be displayed in your life, it will not be by focusing on the external adornment that this world so quickly turns to in order to define "beauty" but instead it is to focus on the hidden person of the heart. Beauty that is honoring before God is characterized by a gentle and quiet spirit and you cannot allow the lies of the world to convince you otherwise. Just like the serpent in the garden in Genesis 3, the world will say, "Indeed did God say?" and will get you to question the Lordship of Christ in your life.

Men, you also need to consider the priority of inner beauty as you consider your relationships with women. What do you truly value and what are you attracted to when it comes to ladies? If you do not see spiritual qualities such as a gentle and quiet spirit before you go looking, you will most likely find out, and sadly find out later that you will have wished for this quality to be present when you find yourself with someone who might be physically attractive but lacking severely in this area and you will find yourself miserable with a "beautiful" woman. It has been show time and time again - can't you just watch the news and see the drama of our celebrity world as it is awash in glamour and appearances, only to find that it as Solomon said, "Vanity of vanities!"

So what are some practical ways to develop and practice a gentle and quiet spirit?

1. In your speech

Proverbs 15:1
A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

What side will you find yourself on this verse? Gentle words or harsh words? Be careful the next time you talk with anyone, but especially those that are close to you, like family and friends. Note the tone of your voice and ask yourself if God would be glorified with harsh words or gentle words. If you are really brave, ask those that you really want to help you to hold you accountable in this area. But you really need to mean it because it will be tremendously difficult. But if anything, it will remind you to discipline yourself for the purpose of godliness.

2. In correction

Galatians 6:1
Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, so that you too will not be tempted.

When you find yourself in a position to correct someone, take a moment to remember that if you really do consider yourself to be spiritually mature, then your correction will take on a tone of gentleness, never out of anger or bitterness or resentment. Too often you can crush a person's spirit when correcting. Consider many children who while they admittedly need correction, only have their hearts bruised and eventually hardened by the harsh tone of correction that is expressed.

Ladies, when you feel hurt or think that the guy is being insensitive or otherwise unkind to you in some way, if you presume yourself to be acting in a God-honoring fashion, a gentle and quiet spirit means that you will not allow yourself to be drawn into a judgmental attitude and then unleash on the other person harsh words that are condemning in nature. You will in fact only condemn yourself to your hypocrisy as you will no doubt find yourself in the other shoes and then you will have nothing to say because your own words will condemn you. Take time to first exercise self-control in your heart and then make sure your words are gentle and quiet. Remember that you will be held accountable for every word that you utter.

Another thing that you as ladies can do is to pursue Titus 2 relationships with older godly women who can practically walk you through what it means to have a gentle and quiet spirit. Now you will have to choose wisely because not all older women in the church necessarily display this kind of quality. But when you do find one (remember they won't be perfect), you need to really grab a hold of that relationship and squeeze them for every ounce of wisdom you can get because it is priceless to have such influences in your life.

For those who have heard me share about them before, Fred and Mary Barshaw were an older couple at Grace Community Church that really impacted my marriage with Angela. Both were such kind and gentle spirits that every time we would talk with them, they would exude the kind of examples that we really cherished and valued. I can't help but notice that there are too few of these kind of examples these days. If there is anything that would be worthwhile to pursue, it would be to have the kind of gentle and quiet spirit that really reflects spiritual strength, stability, and maturity that will then bode well for a relationship in any context, but especially a dating relationship that will hopefully one day lead to marriage.

Well, a long answer to question #1. Hope that helps.

What's the Problem with Dating?

It seems to me that the issue of dating is one that will never go away because we obviously have many singles (both college and post) who are hopeful (or maybe feeling hopeless) in finding that special someone that they hope will one day become their spouse.

The frustration that I have with this issue is that no matter how often we address it at a teaching level, there is the inevitable reaction against principles brought up or maybe even more disconcerting is the obvious lack of attention given to the teaching, resulting in a total oblivious attitude that is seen in the continuation of a worldly mindset that does not reflect wisdom from above as found in Scripture.

There are still those who would insist that it is fine to date a non-Christian, even though there have been very clear statements made regarding this issue. It really should be a non-issue because as a Christian, you should have in common the most important thing in your life, and that is Christ. If you have some misguided notion that through your dating you will be able to bring that unbelieving person to Christ, you really need to be honest with your heart motives and allow the Holy Spirit to pierce you with the Word of God (Hebrews 4:12). It is really a result of a compromise that has often been fostered by even so-called "Christian" parents who really do not prioritize the importance of a genuine faith in Christ. Going to church is often enough for someone to justify that it is okay to date a non-Christian and all too often the relationship starts to move in to areas that really are not glorifying to God. The sad conclusion to this kind of situation is that marriage will often take place and then there is a life-long conflict put into place that no doubt is the source of many conflicts and the greater likelihood of divorce (can you see that the issue of "irreconcilable differences" would actually be coming into play here?).

But I would venture to say that there is hopefully a better understanding about this particular issue at Lighthouse, at least for those who have attended the DTR sessions that we have had (one in fall 2005 and the other in fall 2007, which will continue starting April 13).

I would like to give a reminder to those who attended the first session of DTR2 in October of 2007 with the Reformation principles that provide the foundations for what I believe would be a God-honoring worldview that can then work through the issue of dating. I would concur with others that there are different ways for the idea of "dating" to work toward marriage. But where I would disagree is that if someone were to replace Biblical principles with worldly wisdom (note that I wrote replace), then this directly flies in the face of Romans 12:2, where we should not be in conformity to this world but be transformed by the renewing of our minds.

So a few questions to remind you (in light of this past Sunday's message on Romans 15):

1. Sola Scriptura (Scripture Alone)
Is the inspired, inerrant, infallible Word of God sufficient to provide the final authority to govern all aspects of life, including dating? Or do you seek other sources of "wisdom" to follow?

2. Sola Gratia (Grace Alone)
Are you in agreement that except for the grace of God extended to you that you have absolutely no hope in any aspect of life, including dating? Or do you act in a way that reveals you think you are entitled to something that you think you deserve, especially in SOMEONE you think you deserve?

3. Sola Fide (Faith Alone)
Do you truly trust in the Lord with ALL your heart instead of leaning on your own understanding? Or do you try to manipulate people and circumstances to force your own agenda?

4. Solus Christus (Christ Alone)
Is Christ your first love? Or have you compromised this with the priority of self-love to the point where you want someone to join you in loving yourself instead of Christ?

5. Soli Deo Gloria (Glory to God Alone)
Is it your greatest desire to glorify God in all areas of your life (1 Corinthians 10:31)? Do you truly seek to be a living sacrifice (Romans 12:1)? Or have you exchanged the glory of God for the excrement of this world and the pursuit of self-glory?

Your attitude toward dating will reveal a lot about you as to the reality of these five principles in your life. What is evident through the fall out of those who do not heed God's Word is a clear rejection and rebellion against the wisdom of God and instead the foolish pursuit of worldly thinking.

There are some who need to be confronted. There are others that need to be encouraged. There are the marrieds who need to set an example to the singles. There are youth and children that are watching to see what those who are in this stage will do. So everyone is affected and no one has an excuse to turn a blind eye to this issue.

See you April 13 at 6pm as we resume DTR2.

Pray.

Dedication of our new facilities

God has graciously given our church a new facility and it really is amazing to think that after almost nine years at our previous site we now have a place of our own (to rent still but that's okay). As we have been putting in many hours to get the various aspects of the building ready for use, it really has been a blessing to see so many people willing to give of their time and energy to literally build up the church building. Not only that, as we have various needs arise, such as the need for a cleaning ministry, we have had almost 30 people signup to help with that and so it truly is encouraging to see our church family step up.

Not that I want to get too intense about it, but as I think about how much effort and energy went into building the tabernacle during the time of Moses, or the building of the temple by Solomon, a lot went into the building of a facility that was meant to facilitate corporate worship. But what eventually happened to both? They would lose their meaning as many forgot that worship is not about a building but about the hearts of people congregating to worship God together. It's not just about a ceremonial service or following a liturgy but that every aspect of our lives, whether the singing, the sermon, the fellowship, or even the eating and drinking, that all of it would be done to the glory of God together.

I believe that we in San Diego know little of the tests of adversity but we are tested more with the tests of prosperity. We have so much and yet we often do so little with what we have been given. So I want to really challenge all of our church family members to consider carefully that we have been given a great stewardship. We have a larger sanctuary not just so that we could increase our attendance for having larger numbers but for increasing the corporate worship of God. That will only happen if we are truly setting our eyes on Christ and that He alone would be the focal point of our devotion. That must then be consistently upheld throughout the week in our individual lives wherever we go.

So this Sunday as we look forward to being blessed by the preaching of some wonderful friends of our church - Andy Snider and Chris Mueller, let us remember that it is not the building that makes a church - it is the body of Christ, those who are truly following Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior that make up the church and we must rise up and fulfill the mandate that we have been given:

Mission - to make disciples of Christ (Matthew 28:18-20 *note the addition of verse 18)

Vision - to plant churches (Acts 1:8)

Passion - to love God and people (Matthew 22:37-40)

Bring your family and friends this Sunday to either or both services (9am and 6pm) as we thank God for His grace to us.

Let's get together and shine the light brightly for our God!

JR's thoughts on Resurrection Sunday, 2008

THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THE RISEN CHRIST

1 Corinthians 15:13-14 ¹³ But if there is no resurrection of the dead, not even Christ has been raised; ¹⁴ and if Christ has not been raised, then our preaching is vain, your faith also is vain.

This thought really first occurred to me one afternoon when I was in the church office by myself working on some homework that I had assigned to me in one of my seminary classes. Of what I can recall (not everything’s crystal clear in my head), it had been a long week. Physically, I had been drained from the long commute to L.A. and back to S.D. coupled with the sleep that eluded me that week. Mentally, it was a draining week; studying Hebrew isn’t exactly a piece of cake for someone like me, who struggled with the subject of foreign languages more than any other subject in high school. Emotionally, it had been a stretch; leading small group, meeting up with guys, both in discipling and in being discipled, was tiring for my introverted personality (although I loved every minute of it). So there I was, a joyful yet exhausted pastoral intern, doing whatever he could to spur himself to keep on going for the rest of the afternoon when, for a second, I took a break and stepped back to take a look at my life. At this point, I realized that everything in my life – whether directly or indirectly – was related to ministry. Right then and there, the following words ran through my head: “If Jesus didn’t rise from the grave, I’m completely wasting my life.”

Now, as a pastor (part-time, interim, youth, but still pastor) those same lines ran through my head this weekend – this time with an even deeper impact. For now, everything in my life – EVERYTHING – has to do with ministry. As for my job, I work at the church and earn my living from nothing else. As for my education, I’m pursuing two master’s degrees – only one is in divinity (M. Div) and the other in biblical counseling (M.A.B.C.); biology is now replaced by Bible; chemistry replaced by Christology; physics replaced by Pneumatology; math replaced by ministry. As to driving, I commute 520 miles a week up to L.A. and back to S.D. to attend school. As to sleeping, I’ve had become friends with sleep deprivation to accommodate the driving schedule (although I’ve figured out ways to get more sleep this year). As to eating, I have to eat healthy to make sure that my body can stay not only alive, but awake, to endure the hardships of the work. As to where I live, I’ve had to give up moving back to Hawaii to stay in San Diego to continue to minister in church and pursue the degrees listed above. As for my summer vacations, they’re occupied by summer school and missions trips. As to my relationships with people, everything is devoted to stimulating (or being stimulated by) someone else to look to a crucified Savior. As recreation – well, there’s not much time for that anymore. As for the goal of life – I’ve had to give up pursuing self-glory and fame to instead pursue holiness in Christ-likeness. Everything has to do with church. Everything has to do with ministry. Everything has to do with Jesus.

And so, looking at this kind of a life from a more objective perspective, it’s safe to say that if Christ did not rise from the dead, my life would be one thing and one thing only – a waste. It’s absolutely foolish – FOOLISH I say – to live a life devoted to a crucified peasant carpenter who, after spending three years making what Jewish society at the time looked at as nothing short of outrageous claims of deity and being crucified for it, simply decayed in his tomb like any other man would. It would be absolutely ludicrous to give up an entire life that could be devoted to sensual pleasures of the world to follow a man who could not promise me anything better beyond what I see in the world. It would be nothing short of a waste to deny myself, take up my cross daily, and follow a man who did not rise from the dead. Had that stone not been moved, had that linen not been folded, had Peter and John looked into the grave and seen what they had expected, then get me out of pastoral ministry, for JR is swimming in a bed of lies.

Does it not make sense then, for me to say today that Resurrection Sunday (what we all know as Easter) means more to me than it ever did? The more and more I grow in faith, the harder and faster I pursue holiness, the greater the sacrifices to live this kind of a life become – and the more and more the credibility and purpose of my life depend on the historical fact that Jesus of Nazareth rose from His grave. The longer I walk with Christ, the greater the necessity of faith becomes, and the greater the hope I place in His resurrection. If Jesus did indeed rise from the grave, then my life is not a waste. It is not a life to be pitied, but one to be envied. If Jesus did indeed rise from the grave, then following Him this hard no longer becomes one of many options, but the only option. If Christ did indeed rise, then there is no other alternative than to persevere to eventually be in His presence for eternity.

The next time you treat Easter Sunday as simply another excuse to gather around with buddies for some food, ask yourself if you’ve really given it all to follow Jesus Christ. And if you have, then let the reality of the resurrected Christ renew your minds, encourage your hearts, and stimulate your being to live the life as a slave purchased by the blood of the risen King!

2008 Shepherds' Conference

The most impactful lesson learned from the Shepherds' Conference this year came from a seminar session taught by Rick Holland on "Preparing Your Heart for Preaching." What is funny is that I was actually intending to attend the seminar taught by Phil Johnson but was in the wrong room. Thankfully, there are no accidents with God and what I heard in Rick Holland's seminar was very much needed.

He didn't teach on anything that I didn't learn in seminary. It was going over the basics like praying for your sermon, meditating on your passage, and preaching from the heart. What was most convicting was how far I saw myself straying from these very basic principles. Rick Holland talked about how you can identify if you are being self-reliant by examining your preparation for preaching to see if you are not praying for your messages. This came at me like a stake through my heart.

I had a chance to thank him for his seminar later in the week and he was honestly surprised because I told him that his seminar was the most impactful thing for me from the week. I was glad that he also shared that much of what he taught on he received as a personal rebuke as well.

As pastors, it is easy to make excuses not to pray. The busyness of ministry sometimes drowns out the fundamentals that are vital. How could I possibly think I could preach week after week without depending on the Lord to teach His Word through me? No wonder ministry was becoming so burdensome! I'm so thankful for this year's Shepherds' Conference because it was like a soothing balm for my soul and in the Lord I found great refreshment. It is great to walk away with lessons that I am joyful in being able to apply.

Reflections on the Shepherds Conference 2008

Attending the Shepherds Conference at Grace Church each year with members of our church is always one of the highlights of the year. Over 3000 men come together from all over the nation as well as around the world to hear Christ-centered preaching that upholds the Scriptures and promotes the kind of unique fellowship that occurs when like-minded men gather together to worship, to be equipped, and to stimulate one another with God-honoring conversations.

This year was no different as 13 men from Lighthouse went and enjoyed the preaching of John MacArthur, Tom Pennington, Rick Holland, Al Mohler, Steve Lawson, and Phil Johnson. There were a number of seminar sessions taught by various members of the Grace Church pastoral staff and the Master's Seminary. The short breaks in between were filled with runs to the food stations starting from breakfast to afternoon snacks. The highlight at least from a meal viewpoint was when we got in line to receive our free books and then pickup an In-N-Out lunch. There were books, books, and more books - it's probably the only setting where you see the majority of the crowd interested in books. Getting to meet people from all over is also a highlight as there were over 1000 first time attenders who came to the conference. Running into the sanctuary to get a front row seat is always fun to watch as it is such a contrast from most churches on Sundays where the last rows fill up first.

You can hear the message from this past Sunday on the website audio - it was pretty much a highlight of the lessons learned. But one thing that I am always convicted of more than anything is this - I need to really be on my knees and pray so that I might study the Word of God with the help of the Holy Spirit so that I might proclaim the excellencies of the One who has granted us the gift of the Scriptures so that we might know His heart and live for His glory. It is a humbling task and one that I am always reminded of that I am so unworthy to be a herald for the King of kings and Lord of lords. As a slave, I have no other recourse than to submit my heart, soul, mind, and strength to serve my Master and to point people to Him. Having the mentality of a slave changes everything. Most people, if not all, will take offense to that term. But if you have Master who has shown grace to you, who has shown the extent of His love by having His Son take our place, who has granted to us all the riches in the heavenly places, who has called us to the highest life purpose one can have, that is, to seek first His kingdom and His righteousness so that He might be glorified, there is really nothing more that I can ask for as it is the most magnificent and transcendent purpose one can live for in this life for it extends to eternity.

I hope that you would just get a little glimpse of what it means to follow the Savior. It is not because we are so perfect or because we do it the right way all the time. More often than not we struggle with our human frailities and we stumble due to our proclivity to sin. But by the grace and mercy of our God, we have been granted power from above to be His witnesses, from our home to the remotest parts of the earth and we can and we will be able to experience the work of God in us and through us as we simply deny ourselves, take up our cross daily, and follow our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Let us fix our eyes on Him who loved us first and gave Himself up for us. Let us boast in nothing else than the cross, to know that the sacrifice made was the means by which we have been reconciled to God.

As we move to our new facilities soon, I hope that our excitement is more than just about a new facility. For sure, it is a tremendous gift from God. It is very exciting to have this opportunity. But even more so is the opportunity to love and follow our Savior each and every day as we know that God has promised to do abundantly beyond what we could ask or think. So let's band together as a family and turn San Diego upside down with the gospel according to Jesus and see His Name magnified to all the peoples for His glory alone.

Listening to Great Preaching

Having to preach every Sunday, not to mention on Fridays and other Bible studies, does not give me very many chances to visit other churches to hear other preachers. But for three Sundays, I will have had the opportunity to hear three of my favorites. As I shared in the last entry, I heard Chris Mueller preach and minister to my heart. This past Sunday, I went to Grace Community Church and heard John MacArthur preach from Luke 22. I had not been to a Sunday morning service at Grace since 1989 so it had been quite awhile. The whole service was a reminder of the great blessings I had growing up - the music, the singing, the prayer, even the announcements were all part of looking back and just thanking God for the rich foundation I was granted in my junior high, high school and college years. I got to introduce Kara to John MacArthur and it was a joy to have her sit with me in listening to my pastor.

The past few days I have been in Minneapolis (very cold!!!) where I was able to attend the Desiring God conference for pastors. It was my first time and it really was an incredible time as the theme was on the pastor as father and son. D.A. Carson, a very well-known theologian and professor from Trinity in Chicago was the main speaker along with a few other speakers but his typical thoroughness in addressing the theme was such a deep and hearty feeding of truth that I was really full after hearing him share. John Piper also shared about the legacy that his own father left him and it was really inspirational hearing him share very personally about his relationship with his father who was also a pastor. All the speakers that shared were very much in tune with the challenges and hardships that pastors face so it was with a great measure of empathy that they shared and exhorted and comforted throughout all the messages. There were some statements that were made during one of the messages that really spoke to my heart as they directly related to things that I had been going through and so God was merciful to minister to me while I've had some time to just receive.

This weekend I will get a chance to visit John Piper's church and hear him preach so I'm very excited and looking forward to that as well. I will have then heard three of my favorite preachers in three weeks - what a privilege and treasure it has and will be! Then I'll be back in the pulpit on February 17 and hopefully rejuvenated and refreshed to minister for a long stretch.

Thank you to those who have been praying for me. It has been a stretching time these past few months but God has been gracious to allow me the opportunity to get some rest and I hope that I will be able to encourage you all the more when I return.

Encouraging News

I had the opportunity to visit Faith Bible Church in Murrieta last Sunday where I got listen to Chris Mueller preach. I had not heard him preach in person since around 1988 when he was my college pastor, though I had listened to many of his sermons on audio. But to be able to sit as a normal, regular, church-goer and just soak in the message was like receiving a draught of cool water after being in the desert. It was such an encouragement to my heart to see the same passion yet tempered with wisdom that obviously comes with experience (something I still have much to learn about) as he preached on Deuteronomy 6 and the importance of parenting with the word of God. It was more than just the words that he spoke - it was the heart that was behind it, a heart that has gone through much heartache and sorrow but also much joy and blessing. There is much to be said about having mentors in your life that truly invest in you.

After the message, I went up Chris and he just gave me a big hug and it was like medicine. He has known of my own heartaches throughout the past but especially in the past several months, his counsel and prayers have been invaluable as I know they come from someone who has consistently invested in my life since I was in junior high. Though often times his messages were so convicting, they were never devoid of a tremendous love that he showed in a personal way, even when I was a shy, nerdy kid who never ventured to speak to someone unless spoken to first. He has gone through some tremendous heartaches in ministry as well, which all the more made his counsel more meaningful as he has faced betrayal and the destruction of relationships in ways that I couldn't imagine. Yet he has come out of it still on fire for Christ and he and his wife Jean have been such a blessing to our family that we can't believe God would gift us in such an incredible way.

Meeting the youth pastoral staff, Shawn and John (the high school and junior high pastors) was all the more testimony to Chris' impact on the church ministry. Here are two lay guys who are not paid at all, yet they have given themselves so sacrificially to the youth of the church that in the past year alone, the youth ministry has doubled in size. It's not just that the group has grown numerically. There are about 20 staff members, of which there are an astounding 6 married couples from every range, with those with teens to those who have little babies to those who just got married. Watching them serve the youth at the winter retreat was like reliving my old days at Grace Church. That's what got me into youth ministry in the first place - having been impacted by not only the pastor but by the staff who spent time with me to help me grow in my walk with God.

It was so refreshing to be able to observe another church family that really loves Christ, loves one another, and wants to make a difference in the world. I gave them my best shots, long ones at that =). Yet the youth and even the staff responded with such heart-warming conviction.

It was truly a balm to my soul after having gone through a harrowing time the last year. To be honest, my spirit and heart were severely damaged through all that has happened in the past year and only by the grace of God am I still breathing and looking forward. My physical and emotional well-being have been battered and I'm still recovering in both ways, but God has seen fit to show mercy in allowing me some time to rest (even though I got sick) as well as to reflect on the past year.

It was only in the providence of God that He arranged for me to speak back in October for the youth retreat this past January so that it would give me an opportunity to be encouraged. While I was the one who was the speaker who was supposed to encourage the youth and staff, it was actually the youth and the staff the encouraged me abundantly more and getting to see Chris last Sunday was like whipped cream on top.

God, you are indeed good and sovereignly put all things together for good for those who love you and are called according to your purpose.

I find my rest in you.

Truth that Dares!

The Single Life winter retreat this past weekend was really a wonderful time as we had time to learn, fellowship, pray, and just have some fun together. It was very providential in God's timing that it came this weekend as things had been so difficult for the past several months that I really was in need of some encouragement and the weekend was indeed full of encouragement as there were many, both old and new, who came and made the weekend one that was truly enjoyable.

The message times focused on a number of themes:

1. Dare to Be Truly Spiritual
2. Dare to Hate Respectable Sins
3. Dare to Enjoy Fearing God (Pastor Patrick)
4. Dare to Love God's Way

My hope through the messages was that everyone would really be honest and genuine about where they stood in their relationships with God and the challenge was to really not be complacent or apathetic about it. It was promising to hear that many had taken the messages to heart and I look forward to see the fruit of the application.

Angela and I were quite surprised by the ending of the retreat as Kent Hong came up to share some words of encouragement and present us with a gift so that we could do some things with our family. It was quite overwhelming to have everyone surround us and pray for us. God was truly merciful in encouraging us this way as the past week was one that was pretty difficult in light of recent events. Friday morning of the retreat was probably the most difficult point as I was pretty distraught and discouraged and I think I was at the point where I really was starting to just really wonder why things had happened the way they did. (I know I'm being a bit vague but I hope you understand). My heart was sore (both physically and spiritually) and so preparations for the retreat were a bit difficult to manage all week. But Patrick and JR provided much help and support and the Single Life staff really did their part to make the retreat work out and overall I was just so thankful as I was really a wreck leading into the retreat.

God is indeed merciful as I look back and see how He orchestrates things that ultimately display His grace. I can't help but just really be thankful that God really knows what He is doing and that in time, He brings all things together for good.

Many have been asking about my time off - it's not really a sabbatical but time off from preaching on Sundays and Fridays. I still have much to do with planning things in light of recent changes so it's not as free as I would have hoped for but at the same time it is exciting as God has laid on my heart to really invest in the Children and Youth ministries in laying a vision and direction that will be consistent with an emphasis on Family ministries at our church. So please be in prayer as the next month will really be devoted to developing a vision for those specific ministries.

Thank you for those who pray - it really is the most meaningful thing to me to know that there are faithful prayer warriors who are uplifting this poor undershepherd before the throne of grace.

Take It to the Lord in Prayer

How is your prayer life? It is a question that is often asked in accountability groups. Like with Bible reading, it is sad that so many Christians struggle as much as they do. J. C. Ryle aptly remarks that prayer is a sign of a true believer -- that if someone is truly saved, he will be praying. The fact that so many struggle in their daily prayers shows the spiritual weakness of the church today. Some may be well-versed in theology knowing all the current issues and debates. Others may be experts of the Bible having memorized great portions of it. Still others may be fervent in ministry giving of themselves for the sake of others in sacrificial service. But do they pray? Do you pray?

Certainly, I do not write these things because my prayer life is perfect. (Isn't it funny that sometimes we ask others how they are doing in their spiritual walks just so we can mention how well we are doing?) I struggle very often to pray. It's sad because I know I have access to the God of the universe and that I have a constant help in times of trouble, yet I do not approach the throne room of grace with nearly enough consistency.

I mentioned this in a sermon once but perhaps we do not pray as much as we should because we do not think it will accomplish anything. I know it sounds horrible to admit! I'm sure no good Christian would openly say such a thing. But do the attitudes in our hearts prove this? Isn't this what we preach with our lives when we argue that we are too busy for prayer? Don't we show that we believe prayer is time wasted where we could accomplish more important things? Why pray when you can plan?

"Answer me when I call, O God of my righteousness! You have relieved me in my distress; Be gracious to me and hear my prayer."

I took some time to read from Psalm 4 last week and it was a great reminder to me of why we pray. David comes to God in a time of distress and cries out to God to hear his prayer. He is quick to confess, though, that he should not be heard because of who he is (though he was a king!). He appeals to the God of his righteousness -- the God who has saved him. He understands that he has no righteousness in and of himself and freely admits that his righteousness must come from another. The basis of his prayer and reason why it should be answered is because of who God is. He is a God who saves. How appropriate to be reminded of how God saves when we are in times of distress.

David recalls also how God had saved him. He states, "You have relieved me in my distress." He rec0unts the past deliverances of God, and is reminded that if God has saved before, He will save again. His confidence is in the God who does not change. Perhaps we need to memorize that great hymn, "O God Our Help in Ages Past":

Our God, our help in ages past
Our hope for years to come
Our shelter from the stormy blast
And our eternal home

Under the shadow of Thy throne
Thy saints have dwelt secure
Sufficient is Thine arm alone
And our defense is sure

Is it any wonder that God reminded His followers that He is the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob? If He was faithful to help in ages past, He will be faithful to help today. This is why we should pray, because we have seen the help God has given in the past. He is the one who said to Joshua, "Just as I have been with Moses, I will be with you; I will not fail you or forsake you." He says the same to us.

Finally, David appeals to God's grace to hear his prayer. God is a God who hears prayer and this is because of His grace. He is not obligated to hear us and David recognizes this. He appeals to God's grace. God was gracious to hear him in the past. God was gracious to deliver him from trouble in the past. He thus appeals to God to be gracious once again. Do we keep this attitude in prayer? So often we come to God casually as if God should listen to us! Shouldn't the fear of the Lord drive us to come humbly before Him? Surely we have been granted free access to the throne room of grace, but this does not mean we should enter in with pride. What greater sign of pride than to address God our Creator as if He was our equal?

We need to be praying. This past year has definitely reminded me of that. With all the trials we face and the hardships we endure, we need to appeal to God to help. This is not a time for self-sufficiency and self-reliance. This is a time to lean on the everlasting arms by coming again and again to the God who saves in prayer.

Happy New Year!

Welcome to 2008!!

To say "Happy New Year!" is not something that I really take too seriously as it seems a bit superficial and even contrived when you look at the harsh realities of life. But I think it is something I have had to address in my heart that I often would be more pessimistic in my outlook toward things rather than hopeful and it just might be because the joy and peace in knowing and trusting in Christ is more in the background rather than in the forefront of my heart condition and it inevitably shows.

When I have heart pains, I usually get concerned because I know that my physical heart condition is not so good. I have allowed the circumstances of life at times to overwhelmingly stress me out to the point where my physical body actually feels the consequences of the emotional and mental distress. My teeth have been grinding for so many years that I didn't realize it until half of my bottom teeth were worn away (don't ask to look - it's not a pretty sight). I actually tore a muscle in my mouth last week while I was sleeping, even with my nightguard in place - I didn't know that was possible. My neck and back are so tense at times it feels like I am sleeping on a rock. All this and more have been more than enough proof to show that my emotional and mental state can have some very severe effects on my physical body and I often am in so much pain that I can't stand it.

Left to myself, I am helpless. I can resort to drugs, physical therapy, and other things, but I realize that what really can bring relief (not necessarily physical) is the shoring up of my spiritual condition. When I am truly experiencing joy and peace in Christ, it really does affect my emotional and mental state to the point where I am reminded of the hope I have in Christ and the anxiety no longer paralyzes me. But when my gaze is not fixed on Christ, I find it so easy to be not only distracted, but to be redirected as to how I live my life.

This new year afforded me the opportunity to do some evaluating of my heart condition and I have come to see that I need to be more resolved in pursuing the hope of my life - Jesus Christ. It really is in Christ alone that I can find the joy and peace that anchors my hope and trust in Him. It is in Christ alone that I can have the right perspective in life amidst the challenges and trials that come and go. It is in Christ alone that I ultimately find my life's purpose and apart from Him, there would truly be no real reason to live.

So while circumstances are not necessarily so "happy", I have found joy in my salvation, I have found peace in the sovereignty of God, and I have found hope in the promises of a faithful God who I know will consistently and daily make manifest His mercy and grace to a sinner like me.

Happy New Year!!